I have been to Rome twice. Italy for those of you who know about the charming town of Rome, Georgia - which I have also visited! Anyway, back to the cra.. Italians. So there we were having dinner with Giancarlo's mom Carla, Enzo, and Giancarlo's aunt Giovanna. This was... Feb 2002. We had pizza I think. If you have ever been to Rome, than you know that a favorite past time of the residents is honking the car horn while screaming out the window. Maybe because you are only going 60 miles over the speed limit and it is not fast enough. Maybe because you are enjoying a meal at an outside cafe and you are not twirling your pasta just so. Perhaps the person honking has just stopped by your house for a visit and noticed that you DON'T IRON YOUR SHEETS. This is more serious than you think.
Back to the story. So we were having a nice dinner, and I don't know if you have been to Rome or not, but the way they park is like this... they park EVERYWHERE. Sidewalks, restaurant entrances, in trees, with the headlights against the side of a random building. There is no wrong way to park in Rome. One of the trappings of having too many cars and not enough parking is that you can pretty much bet you will get double parked during your stay (if you are dumb enough to attempt drive there). As we exited the restaurant, we noted that we were, in fact, double parked. Oh man, bummer! Right? WRONG. This is not a "bummer" in Rome. This is a tragedy the depths of which YOU HAVE NO IDEA. I proceed to climb in the back seat and G gets in the driver's seat. But where are Carla, Enzo and Aunt Giovanna going? I'll tell you where they are going. THEY ARE GOING TO GET THE DOUBLE PARKING OFFENDER. I will repeat that this is a regular occurrence in Rome. Nothing unusual. Sometimes you really can only park 3 rows out from the curb - it happens. HOWEVER. Should this happen to any locals during your visit I urge you.. no I IMPLORE you to stop right where you are and enjoy the show. Because there isn't a comedy in existence that will even touch how funny it is.
So there I am. Backseat. Seat belt on. Hmmm.. I see Carla, Enzo and Aunt Giovanna heading back into the restaurant. They are in single file formation and each of them is making grand hand gestures and shouting different things in Italian. It sounds like "ba! beh beh BAH! be beh BAHHH!!" and the sound is dying off as they get further from the car. All I can see is 3 ducks in a row, shuffling along, mouths open and arms flailing. I start to feel what I think is a little embarrassed. Turns out I had NO IDEA WHAT EMBARRASSED meant. Waiting waiting waiting.. in the car... I jerk strait up to the sound of honking. It's Giancarlo. He has started rhythmically honking the horn. "HONK... HONK.... HONK... HONK...". It almost sounds like a car alarm, it is so precise in its cadence. I can feel myself slide down a little in the back seat.
Time passes. Honking continues. I sink down in rhythm with the honks. Then I notice a man exiting the restaurant. He looks really annoyed and is throwing his hands up - mouth moving. His hands keep getting thrown up, frown getting bigger with each step. Then I see Carla, Enzo and Aunt Giovanna, still in single file, mirroring the man's movements. Hands up, yelling, flailing hands, hearts breaking... they have located the offending double parker and they are all 3 giving him a piece of their mind. Mind you, Giancarlo is still honking. Honking, screaming, arms waiving.. Paige is now sitting on the car floor with my head between my knees. Embarrassed doesn't cover it, maybe horrified? Disbelieving?
Whenever I think Giancarlo is overreacting about something, I remind myself of this story. It gives me perspective. ITALIAN STYLE.